Visitor's Guide to South Padre Island Weekly News - 6th Edition

The Holidays Are Approaching: Well, it is that time of the year for many of my acquaintances to start speaking again. I know that you are familiar with those types and probably have several on your list. I am talking about those people who would not give you the time of day 10 months out of the year but when the holidays roll around they always want to wish you a nice Thanksgiving, Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year. It is too bad they don't understand a "Good morning!", "Good afternoon!", "How are you doing?" and etc. the other 10 months of the year. So, before I see any of those who are in that group, let me be one of the first to say to all ya'll and to them, HAPPY HOLIDAYS!

A solution for Spring Break Traffic? Well, you just never can guess what they will think of next? With one of these at every intersection on the Island, if nothing else we should be able to bring traffic to a complete standstill, even more than has existed in the past! I do not know how well this new traffic light system will set with the Beatification Committee? With all the extra money Pam Aikman, manager of Tom & Jerry's, will be making, perhaps she can convince Jerry to buy a listing from us? There are other weird photos shown at the link below this article. A great job by our graphic art department at VGTSPI! The link below came to me by email from my friend, Diane Irizarry, a local property owner who resides in McAllen. Thanks LadyDi!

Click Here to See More Funny Photos!

It isn't a Red Fish! Living on the Bay and having access to the Gulf does not necessarily give you a lock on large fish. One of our readers sent this picture and a link to remind us there are great big fresh water fish. I suspect the catfish at right was caught on a night-crawler with a cane pole! The best I can tell, the fish was caught somewhere in France. If you would like to look at the main site, it has over 200 beast-sized fresh water fish.Click here to see some more big fish!

Coming to the Island Soon! No, this local entertainer already lives here and has for the past 14 years. You will probably not recognize the picture of him because he needed to see Bell Hudson before it was taken! I really like those pants! You will be surprised! In the next issue, there will be an article called, "Who's behind the counter?" in the Editor's section. Many Islanders are living here who once were (and still are) great musicians and have laid their instruments aside to do other things. The establishment said so! Would you believe that Ed Walsh, Jr. of Island Pharmacy is one of the best drummers you will ever hear? Well, he is, and there are many others living here who could have easily been and were professional musicians for many years. If you know of any, please send me an email and they will be included; also, if you know this long-haired hippy pictured on the left, send an email to: cweed@spisland.com

This Week's News is sponsored by the Coastal Current: Thanks again to "Yo Bubba" Jim Goller for sponsoring This Weeks News! And congratulations on your 11th year in business! Because of limited space and not wanting to clutter the weekly news with advertising, there will never be more than one sponsor per week. If you are interested in becoming a sponsor, your name will be placed on a rotated schedule. For more information send an email to: sponsor@spisland.com

Need Advertisers and Sponsors for all this traffic! Oh my! The hit counter on the website was screaming on Tuesday the 12th! By 6:00pm the sucker had registered over 2,200 hits and that is an all time record for one day! The newsletter was sent to the majority of our subscribers late Monday night because of a software problem with our bulk mailer. If you would like to see our meter tracking for the past 20 days, CLICK HERE TO SEE OUR TRACKING, scroll down and look at Tuesday November 12th! We recognize that this is a slow time of the year, but advertisers are reaping the benefits of the Weekly News. We are working hard to promote the Island and will continue to do so. Again, our special appreciation is extended to all of the businesses who are taking advantage of our website, http://www.spisland.com/! If you would like to have information on how to advertise on the website and become a sponsor of the VGTSPI Weekly News, send an email to sponsor@spisland.com. At $300.00 per year, it will be the best advertising money your business has ever spent! We are locally owned and operated and know the pulse of the Island!

DO YOU LIKE TO GAMBLE BUT CAN'T GET TO LAS VEGAS? This is a new addition to the website where you can play for real money! This section is for ADULTS ONLY! Currently there is a Thanksgiving special for new and old players. Oh, my did I say Thanksgiving? Click here to visit the Windows Casino Page!

IN MY EMAIL: In reference to last weeks article about obesity, Judith Beat, local travel agent, wrote that Southwest Airlines already has a policy concerning obesity. Their rules will only allow persons who are able to occupy a seat with the seat belt fastened. It looks like you might have to buy two seats. Oh, she also mentioned that I had spelled Mr. Russell Judah's last name as Judith, sorry about that.

C. Weed needs your help again! I recently wrote concerning my computer being under attack by a band of Islamic fanatics. I appreciate everyone helping because the attacks have subsided. Much to my dismay, another attacker is viciously attacking my computer. Once again I implore all the readers to email abuse@ev1.net and ask them to find the unknown attacker who has made 4415 attacks to break into my computer. Their DSN number is 64.246.31.136. Whoever they are should email me and I will gladly give them the information they want. If you do not have a firewall on your computer you are asking for it! Identity theft has become rampant! ................ CLICK HERE TO PURCHASE NORTON INTERNET SECURITY PROTECTION

Congratulations to Jake's Restaurant: This past Sunday was Jake's 20th anniversary! I knew about this in advance; however, Jake threatened me in relation to announcing it. The way it turned out, many long time Islanders had to be taken from the establishment in wheel barrows! To see Jake's listing on our web site, CLICK HERE TO SEE JAKESl

Advertising: Who needs billboards? SPI does! One of the things that many native Texans and imported Texans do not know is that IF TEXAS SECEDED FROM THE USA, IT WOULD BE ONE OF THE TOP 10 ECONOMIC POWERS IN THE WORLD! Read it again, "Texas would be one of the top 10 economic powers in the world if it seceded from the USA!" Over the past several years, I have made it a point to always find out from our visitors how they heard about South Padre Island? Not one has ever answered by saying they saw a South Padre Island billboard. I have been very curious about this and recently learned the reason nobody has ever seen one, is the fact that we don't have any! After digging deeper, I am informed that our town does not believe they are effective. I really think we are stupid! Where would Burma Shave have been without billboards? (CLICK HERE TO SEE SOME CLASSIC BURMA SHAVE SIGNS & AND A NEW ONE FROM C. WEED). Traveling across our country, I have seen billboards for Charmin, Texaco, Mobile, Citgo, Levis, Kelloggs, Disneyland, Nike, Mothers Against Drunk Drivers, Sea World, Volkswagen, the Astrodome, NASA, the Big Texan Steak House, and countless other major entities using billboards. I would like to ask, how did we get smarter than than all of the powerful corporations who have tried and tested outdoor advertising strategy for more years than we have been a town? How many people have stopped into the Big Texan Steak House, because of a billboard, and tried to eat a 10 lb. steak for free? Major corporations and businesses have billboards scattered everywhere and in every state. Our town's lack of outdoor advertising is an arrogant way of saying the corporate giants are ignorant and wasteful while our little community is smarter than they are when it comes to using our available advertising dollars. Please consider the article by Outdoor Advertising Association of America, Inc.. If you do not have time to read it, in summation, it points out that in our society we are limited in time but we are a nation on the move. Virtually everyone has an occasion to drive and outdoor media does catch eyes and it is cost effective!

I am sick and tired of our efforts to compete with Daytona, Ft. Lauderdale, Miami, Panama City and others. I can't understand why we don't take advantage of our small community that does not have daily traffic problems, other than Spring Break. We should focus upon our town's small size as an advantage and couple that with a two nation vacation theme. This past summer evidenced that many people are not comfortable flying since 9/11 and therefore drove here to take their family vacation. Where did the majority of these people drive in from? If you guessed Texas, you are right! This raises another point about using our advertising dollars. Why should we devote advertising dollars to entice anyone in the Northeastern sector of our country to come here on vacation when they can have a special package (including airfare and lodging) going to the Bahamas for 4 days and three nights cheaper than what their airfare would cost them to fly here one-way and before paying for their lodging? I am of the opinion this makes a great case toward spending more advertising dollars within the confines of this great State to attract our own residents. An increase in Texas motorist tourists makes sense. It is evident that billboard advertising is a proven economical means to promote products, destinations, and public messages. It is more cost effective than our town's ads placed in magazines that will only be of value until the next issue appears. I sincerely believe if we cut our advertising budget by one-half and used the remaining amount to market ourselves only in Texas, we would increase our tourism.

I personally believe the funds we are spending on the Hollywood connection are wasted. If we were to get a major film produced locally, the end result would be seeing South Padre Island rolling by so fast in the film credits you would need to have had Evelyn Woods Reading Dynamics to see it. Think about the last movie you watched and where it was filmed? South Padre's name whizzing by in the the film credits is only an ego thing and probably would bring very little recognition to our area. Another issue is that we will probably be required to give away the statue of Padre Balli, free food and lodging, free stand-ins, and a host of other perks to get a film company in here to make a movie. To quote Jimmy Dean, "When the country and western dog comes to town, only one of two things will happen. Somebody is gonna get bit or somebody is gonna get screwed." I believe the "motion picture dog" is just as ruthless. The professional people in Hollywood and Nashville are "super sharks" and prey upon unsuspecting country folk such as we are. The word used in the industry is "hype." Sure, they're gonna treat you right, give you their attention, and insinuate that there is something up the road. That is the hype! After you have paid your airfare there and back, your lodging, and probably picked up the dinner tab for the movie tycoons, you could have had a couple of billboards that would have brought someone down here that is willing to spend some money. In my view, the closest our people have been to any celebrity is in front of their own TV sets. With all due respect to Erica Pena and Mary Kay Pollard of the Convention Centre, what marketing credentials do either of them have to enlist anyone in Hollywood? I do not take away from the fact that they are both very intelligent, personable people, and great workers. Neither of them have the skills to lobby for us in Austin for a second causeway that is costing the EDC and our town $12,000.00 per month. We hired someone who is a professional in that area of expertise. My point is that we have the Texas Film Commission that has been in existence longer than we have been a town. Isn't their forte getting movie companies to make movies in Texas, aren't they the experts? I don't understand why we have chosen a route to do this on our own and not allow the Texas Film Commission to lead us? We should be using Erica and Mary Kay to lobby at the Texas Film Commission not in Hollywood. It is understandable if Hollywood comes here and rapes us; but, it is unforgivable if we go to Hollywood and we rape ourselves! It seems we have an endless supply of advertising dollars for experimentations sake. It has been stated that our motion picture efforts will reap fruit in 2005. I personally think the fruit will be sour grapes. And, furthermore there are numerous businesses that need money at the time you're reading this and many others will need tourist dollars long before the year 2005! Is there anyone out there on the Convention Centre Committee that understands this? It appears that some members are like the little puppy dogs in the back of car windshields that just shake their heads up and down. Blow-up dolls sitting in the committee seats might provide as much input as some of the committee members? And, I have another question about CVB. Is the CVB Advisory Board really charting the course for the Convention Centre or does the Convention Centre chart the course for the CVB Advisory Board? Common sense will tell you the way it should be. If you are a resident or business owner on the Island and agree with me about outdoor advertising and Hollywood, please call the committee members of the CVB Advisory Board: Tim Goodman 761-1560, Bill Donahue 761-6511, Gary Graham 761-8599, Debbie Moutsos, Chairman 761-2599, Mike Lemmons 761-5460, and Perry "Bud" Inhofe 761-1953. Perhaps you are tired of shaking puppy dog heads too! If they won't listen to you, send the Alderman and Mayor an email by clicking on their name: Doyle Wells, Dr. Gerald Sher, Rick Wells, David Eymard, Troy Giles and Mayor Bob Pinkerton. Otherwise, their telephone numbers can be obtained from the town at 761-6456 if you wish to speak with them personally.

The smart approach to a planned community: I am amused at the number people I hear talking about SPI needing to be a planned community. The fallacy of passing building codes to mandate construction types to be uniform at this time is that we have so many businesses and homes that would be grand-fathered. The first thing that should happen is to have the voting public decide on this issue. If the majority favors a planned community, a "reconstruction" committee should be established to set the guidelines of whatever the public mandate may be. We are all guilty of forgetting that this wonderful paradise will not be as it is forever. Mother nature has an unknown plan and time for the Island. It is not a question of if we will get hit by a massive hurricane, the question is when? After that eventuality occurs, all properties would be reconstructed according the theme mandated and approved by the public. The "new" Island would then be uniform without any form of grand-fathering.

And, speaking of the Island's future: IMPORTANT FOR ISLAND RESIDENTS! Persons living on the Island should read the following important information from our Mayor: CLICK HERE I would like to thank the Mayor and EDC for finally realizing that many people are unable to attend public meetings and forums scheduled between 9:00am and 5:00pm. To me those times are for the retired public, or somebody that does not have a real job. There are two sessions of the meeting that will allow businesses and property owners to participate in at least two of the five scheduled meetings after hours. It is a most welcome change which will allow everyone the opportunity to participate, if they desire. Perhaps some of our other "public" committee meetings could be scheduled at times for everyone to participate? Get it anyone? Most of the time our "public meetings" are not so public!

The Round-ball Tournament will be held November 22nd-24th: If you would like to help defray the $400,000 plus expenditure that the town of South Padre Island endured to have this tournament scheduled here, you need to attend! I am informed that maybe next year we can have the State high-school basketball play-offs? God only knows how long it will take us to get our money back? If you have a volley team, basketball team, or any other need to use the Convention Centre's new wooden court and bleachers, please send me an email! cweed@spisland.com.

A HOLIDAY REMINDER: I am reminded by my good buddy, Lloyd Llove, that those who desire musical entertainment for the holidays, including New Year's Eve, should book someone now! Visit Lloyd Llove's Musical Website to learn more about him. If you would like information on booking Lloyd Llove, send an email to lloydllove@spisland.com. You owe me three, Lloyd!

OXYMORONS ARE FUNNY: An Oxymoron is a combination of contradictory or incongruous words. Enjoy:

acute dullness · act naturally · Advanced BASIC · airline food · almost exactly · alone together · Amtrak schedule · bittersweet · boring court jester · briefing · British fashion · business ethics · butthead · cafeteria food · calm wind · cardinal sin · casual sex · cheerleading scholarship · childproof · Christian Scientists · civil engineer · clean coal · coal mine safety · computer jock · computer security · clearly ambiguous · clearly confused · clearly misunderstood · comfortably dressed · conservative liberal · conciliation court · constant variable · constructive attitude · corporate conscience · cowardly lion · dangerously safe · deafening silence · definite maybe · deliberately thoughtless · democratic machine · designer jeans · diet ice cream · divorce court · domestic bliss · double solitaire · educational television · effective compassion · essential service · even odds · exact estimate · extensive briefing · extinct life · family vacation · fan fatale · federal budget · fish farm · flexible ethics · found missing · free love · freezer burn French deodorant · fresh-frozen · friendly fire · friendly takeover · funky white guy · genuine imitation · genuine imitation naugahide good grief · good shit · government organization · guest host · healthy chocolate · hells angels · holy war · half naked · home office humanitarian invasion · idiot savant · ill health · industrial park · instant classic · intense apathy · jumbo shrimp · justice rehnquist · larger half · least favorite · legally drunk · light rock · linear curve · liquid gas · light beer · little giants · living dead · long sleeved t-shirt · loud librarian · managed competition · marital bliss · Microsoft Works · mild interest · mild mannered reporter · military intelligence · minor crisis · minor miracle · misanthropic humanitarian · modern history · moral majority · natural blonde · new classic · New York culture · non-alcoholic beer · non-alcoholic wine · non-dairy creamer · non-working mother · normal deviation · obscene art · old news · only choice · on-time airplane · on-time musical production · on-time train · open secret · original copies · original reprint · oxymoron · paid volunteer · passive aggression · peace offensive · peacekeeper missile · plastic glasses · plastic silverware · player coach · player piano · polite salesman · political science · post feminist · postal service · pretty ugly · private citizen · qualified success · randomly organized · rap music · Reagan Democrat · real potential · religious tolerance · republican party · resident alien · rock opera · rolling stop · rush hour · sad clown · safe sex · sanitary landfill · sanitary sewer · same difference · scheduled spontaneity · scientific belief · second best · sensitive guy · serious musician · seriously funny · silent scream · simply superb · small crowd · socialist market economy · soft rock · software documentation · standard deviation · straight angle · student athlete · study outside · successful suicide · sweet sorrow · sweet tart · synthetic natural gas · tame cat · taped live · temporary tax increase · terribly enjoyable · terribly pleased · tight slacks · tragic comedy · train schedule · trial separation · turbo diesel · twelve-ounce pound cake · unbiased opinion · uncrowned king · unhappily married · united nations · unsellable stock · unsung hero · vaguely aware · virtual reality · war games · wholesome · working vacation and Black Light

November 29th
2002 Holiday Lighting Contest for Residential, Restaurant, Retail/Office, and Hotel/Motel/Condo Associations sponsored by the South Padre Island Chamber of Commerce. It is free! No Entry Fee! There will be a $250 award for the winner in each of the four categories. Enter by Dec. 11^th, Judging Dec. 14^th and 15^th. Winners Announced Dec. 16^th. Register with the Chamber. Call for information 761-4412.